28+ Funny Telephone Jokes - Museum of Jokes

What was more important than the invention of the first telephone?

The second telephone.

Why did the burger sit beside the telephone?

Incase onion rings

How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.

What do you get if you cross a telephone with a night crawler?

Ringworm!

What do you call a telephone call from one vicar to another ?

A parson to parson call !

What are four ways of spreading information that begins with "tel"?

Telephone, telegram, television, and tell a woman.

What do you get if you cross a telephone with a hunting dog?

A golden receiver!

What do pirates use telephones for?

Booty call

This joke may have profanity.

What did the answering machine say to the telephone?

Take my word for it.

What do a telephone and a dog have in common?

They both have collar ID.

What do all the Smiths in the telephone book have in common?

They all have telephones...

How is a telephone like a dirty bathtub?

They both have rings!

What is your favorite Chuck Norris joke?

My Favorite, When Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone he had three missed calls from Chuck Norris.

What do you get if you cross a telephone with an iron?

A smooth operator!

What happened to the little frog who sat on the telephone?

He grew up to be a bellhop!

What do you get when you cross a telephone with a pair of pants?

Bell-bottoms!

How did the telephones get married ?

In a double ring ceremony !

What do you get if you cross a pig and a telephone ?

A lot of crackling on the line !

What do you get if you cross a telephone and a marriage bureau ?

A wedding ring !

Who invented the telephone?

The Phoenicians (phone-itions).

What fish sounds like a telephone?

Herring herring...herring herring...herring herring.

Why is an engaged girl like a telephone?

Because they both have rings.

What's the three fastest ways of communication?

Telephone, telegraph, and tell-a-woman.

What do you say when the inventor of the telephone falls over?

Alexander Graham Fell!

How do Iranians speak on the telephone?

Persian-to-Persian (person-to-person).

What are the three fastest forms of communication?

Telephone, telegraph, tell a woman.

What animals talk on the telephone the most?

The yakety-yaks!

What was a more important invention than the first telephone?

The second one.