Year Old Jokes

What kind of gum do bees chew?

BUMBLEGUM. Five year olds think it's hilarious. I do not.

Wacky Jokes for Kids: Over 500 Kids' Jokes including One-Liners, Knock-Knock Jokes, Tongue Twisters and Wacky Facts for Kids - Perfect for kids ages 5 to 12

4.7

Paperback

Available on

Why shouldn't you tell a pirate your secrets?

They ain't private ears. (I don't care if a six year old came to this first thirty years ago, it just came to me.)

What's the best thing about dating twenty nine year olds?

The get all you '90s references.

What's the best part about showering with an eight year old girl?

Slicking her hair back and making her look like a six year old boy.

Why was the four year old boy from Sierra Leone crying?

He was having a midlife crisis

What do cannibals put in their soup?

Ramen! Before you judge harshly, I would like to state that this was invented by a six year old, all on his own, no coaching.

What's the best part about banging twenty two year olds?

There's twenty of them.

What do you call a five year old with no friends?

A Sandy Hook survivor.

What's the best part about sleeping with twenty five year olds?

There's twenty of them.

What's the difference between a cranky two-year-old and a duckling?

One is a whiny toddler, and the other is a tiny waddler!

What's the best thing about punching twenty one years olds?

There's twenty of them.

4.7

Paperback

Available on

What's the best part about bangin' twenty six year olds?

You get to meet Jared Fogel.

What is the difference between a bag of cocaine and a four year old?

Eric Clapton wouldn't drop a bag of cocaine out the window

What breaks when you give it to a twelve year old?

Her hips.

What's Michael Jackson's favorite thing about twenty-eight year olds?

There's 20 of them.

What's the difference between an Irishman and a bottle of whiskey?

The whiskey usually doesn't get drunk until it's at least ten years old.

What country does fried fish swim in?

Greece! (courtesy of my ten year old)

What's the best thing about twenty-three year olds?

There's 20 of them

What's the best thing about twenty nine year olds?

There's 20 of them

Whats the best thing about doing twenty four year olds?

Theres twenty four of them.

What's the difference between a four year old and a baggie of cocaine?

Eric Clapton wouldn't let a baggie of cocaine fall out the window.

Dock Tok Presents…The Good, the Dad, and the Punny: Jokes from the Water’s Edge

4.8

Paperback

Available on

What's the difference between a four year old and a bag of cocaine?

Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall out a window.

How many defensive coordinators does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Zero. You can't fit a hairless ten-year-old inside a light bulb.

What is the best thing about twenty six year olds?

There are twenty of them

What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a four-year old child?

Eric Clapton never would have let his bag of coke fall out of a 49th-story window!

Where do American bees store their honey?

In a USBee hive. Thank my ten year old for that one.

Where do you find a five year old with no legs?

Exactly where you left him

Whose mother likes rap music?

Yo Momma! My eight-year-old daughter wants to see how many upvotes she can get. Ten-year old brother is interested in downvotes.

What's the best part about twenty two year old wheels of cheese?

There are twenty of them.

Why did the banana go to the doctor?

He wasn't peeling very well. Credit to my four year old niece.

What's the best thing about sleeping with twenty two year old's?

There is twenty of them.

Jokes for Kids: The Best Jokes, Riddles, Tongue Twisters, Knock-Knock jokes, and One liners for kids: Kids Joke books ages 7-9 8-12

4.7

Paperback

Available on

What's the best part about twenty eight year olds?

There's twenty of them.

What walks on 8 legs until it's one years old, 4 legs until it's twenty years old and then 2 legs for the remainder of it's life?

Fred and George Weasley.

What's the nutritional value of an entire tube of cherry Chapstick?

Asking for my two year old.

What do you call a vampire after it is one-year-old?

A two-year-old vampire.

What is the hardest part about sleeping with twenty one year olds?

There is twenty of them

What's the best thing about twenty eight year olds?

There's twenty of them.

What's the best part about dating twenty two year olds?

There are 20 of them.

Why do chickens sit on eggs?

Because they don't have any chairs. Source: my five-year-old.

What's the best part of twenty eight year old chicks?

There's twenty of them.

What breaks when you give it to a six year old?

His hips

What do you call a fast clothes maker?

Taylor Swift! Made up by my nine year old :)

How does a dark-skinned boy have light-skinned hands?

because paint! -my four-year-old daughter.

Why were the police at the day care?

Because some of the two-year-olds were resisting a rest.

Why did the zombie cross the road?

To get his guts back. My three year old made that one up, I though it was pretty good :)

What's the best thing about twenty three year old's?

They're of age.(http://www.youtube.com/watch v=lZg3-Y1QIc4)

What's the best thing about twenty-two year olds?

There's twenty of them. It's better said then written.

Why did the aligator spit out his lunch?

Because it was two years old

What's the best thing about screwing twenty one year olds?

There are twenty of them.

What's the best thing about twenty three year olds?

There's twenty of them.

What's the difference between a four-year-old and a bag of cocaine?

There's no way Eric Clapton would let a bag of cocaine fall out of a window!

You might also enjoy:

Base Jokes More Base Jokes

What does acid reflux and dubstep have in common?

They both get better when you drop the "base".

Why can't Intel-based phones enjoy Pokmon Go?

Because Intel Inside.

Bear Jokes More Bear Jokes

Why'd you name me Carson, dad?

You were born in a car. Now go fetch your sister, Hospitaldaughter. It's time for tablemeal.

How do Russians drive to Alaska?

By bearing straight

6 Year Old Jokes More 6 Year Old Jokes

How many NRA members does it take to stop a 6-year-old paraplegic from stealing a candy bar?

Nobody knows - they usually lose count at 800 rounds.

What's the difference between a 6 year old and a 16 year old?

Which hole they stick their finger in when no-one's looking.

20 Jokes More 20 Jokes

What's the best part of dating 29 year olds?

There's 20 of them. (More funny out loud)

How do you confuse Pareto?

Tell him you belong to "the" 20%.

100 Year Old Jokes More 100 Year Old Jokes

What's the difference between a 100 year old and a 4 year old?

What base you're counting in.

What would you call a 100 year old can of baked beans?

Has-beens.

God Jokes More God Jokes

What did God say to the alcoholic spelling bee judge?

Define intervention." Came up with this today at work.

What did God say when he saw the first black person?

Ooops, I burnt one!

Life Jokes More Life Jokes

What elements make up life?

Lithium and Iron

Why was the kamikaze pilot so depressed?

He felt his life was heading for a downward spiral.

Cook Jokes More Cook Jokes

Why can't short people cook?

Because the steaks are too high.

Why didn't you make all the food on that long order?

Cook: Because I'm a short order cook.