How long does it take a baby to die in the microwave?

I don't know, I lose track of time when I have an erection.

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Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

What's long and black?

every day How did Hellen Keller lose her virginity Someone left a plunger in the toilet

How do you make people lose faith in this sub?

This.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

When did this happen ?

a) I don't know he also stole my watch.

What do you get when you cross a ring-tailed lemur with a U-Haul truck?

I'm not sure, but I know

Erection Jokes More Erection Jokes

What do you call an erection during a funeral?

Mourning wood!

What is the hardest thing about walking through a field of dead babies?

My erection.

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What will men do for pleasure at that time?

God: *sigh* Fine. Mouths. But they'll talk. A lot.

What time of day is it in France right now?

Mourning

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What dies a little, when explained about?

A joke.

Why did Bilbo Baggins live for so long?

Because old Hobbits die hard...

Microwave Jokes More Microwave Jokes

Where do puppies go when they die?

Back into the microwave so I can get in another round.

How do you get a kid out from a microwave?

Please answer before my wife gets home!

Baby Jokes More Baby Jokes

Why was Marc Antony still interested in Cleopatra even when she's just had a baby?

Because it was delivered via Ceasarion section

What scratches the window before it explodes?

A baby in a microwave

Track Jokes More Track Jokes

What kind of horse has trouble keeping track of his Macintosh?

An Appaloosa!

Which bounty hunter specializes in tracking elves?

Jingle Fett