What is every young ladys ultimate Disney fantasy?

To sit on Pinnochios face and hope he tells lies.

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Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

Why is a restless man in bed like a lawyer?

Because he lies on one side and then turns around and lies on the other one.

Who is the most trustworthy lover?

Shakira. Her hips don't lie.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How can you tell if you are looking at a police glow worm ?

it has a blue light !

How can you tell a chemist from a plumber?

Ask them to pronounce "unionized".

Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

Why did they kick Raggedy Anne out of the toybox?

She kept on sitting on Pinocchio's face yelling "Lie to me... lie to me!"

Why did the vampire sit on a pumpkin?

It wanted to play squash.

Disney Jokes More Disney Jokes

What do Disney movies and coathangers have in common?

They can both bring out the child from within.

What do Intel, Google, Uber, eBay, McDonalds, Budweiser, AT&T, Oracle, Disney, Boeing, IBM and Apple have in common?

Immigrants

Hope Jokes More Hope Jokes

What is the difference between a woman in church and a woman in a bathtub?

Answer: One has hope in her soul the other has soap in her hole.

How do you make a Whiskey Sour?

Crush it's hopes and dreams.

Pinnochio Jokes More Pinnochio Jokes

What secret organization does Pinnochio work for?

Wooden you like to know

Why does Pinnochio always get an erection when he's in a forest?

Because he has a woodpecker!