What's the difference between a nail, a screw, and a bolt?

A girl raises her hand and says, "I don't know. I've never been bolted before."

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between an Irish Funeral and an Irish Wedding?

One less drunk person.

Whats the difference between a woman and a floppy drive?

A Floppy Drive can only take 3.5" Inches.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do you know your dog's cancer is really bad?

If the vet says it's mutt-astasized.

How do you know if an introvert likes you?

He looks at your shoes instead of his

Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

How many socialists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

All of them.

How many Americans does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, that's a Mexican's job.

Girl Jokes More Girl Jokes

What is a pirates nightmare date?

A girl with a sunken chest and no booty

What do you call the girls who outrun me?

Virgins.

Nail Jokes More Nail Jokes

Why did the elephant paint its nails red?

So it could hide in the strawberry patch.... Have you ever seen an elephant in a strawberry patch? No? See, it worked!

Why did Carrie Fisher enjoy doing her one-woman show?

Because she nailed that Solo.

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

Where can a hand refuel its car?

At a fist pump.

Why should you never play poker with a crocodile?

You will lose every hand.

Raise Jokes More Raise Jokes

What did Adam do when he wanted some sugar?

He raised Cain.

What do you get when you take an HIV medication and raise the price 5,000%?

Rich AND famous, apparently

Bolt Jokes More Bolt Jokes

Why did the bolt in the ceiling have to go to therapy?

Because it was screwed up!

What did one bolt of cloth say to the other bolt of cloth after hurting its feelings?

I'm sari.