What' the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

Anyone can roast beef, but not everyone can pea soup. (As told by my 8yo, who made me laugh with a joke for the first time. Proud dad moment.)

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Why did the lady stare at the orange juice?

Because she thought it was telling her to concentrate!

Why does Stevie Wonder smile all the time?

No one told him he's black.

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Why shouldn't you wear a watch on your belt?

It'd be a waste of time.

Why did the composer spend all his time in bed?

He wrote sheet music.

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What goes "ha ha, thump thump?

A guy laughing his balls off.

What did the alcoholic Dad, away on business, say to the bartender at the hotel bar?

I'm ready to partiem with my perdiem *sorry, not a dad, and the bar tender didn't laugh either

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What's the difference between organized crime and the government?

Only one of them is organized. Couldn't help but post this. Went to see a former mafia boss today, and that joke was told leading up to him speaking.

How to ruin a joke on Reddit?

Misspell the paunch line.

Roast Beef Jokes More Roast Beef Jokes

What' the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

Anyone can roast beef, but not everyone can pea soup. (As told by my 8yo, who made me laugh with a joke for the first time. Proud dad moment.)

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

Everyone can roast beef, but no one can pea soup.

Pea Soup Jokes More Pea Soup Jokes

Whats the difference between Mashed Potatoes and Pea Soup?

Anyone can mash potatoes!

What's the difference between roast chicken and pea soup?

I can roast chicken but I can't pea soup

Soup Jokes More Soup Jokes

Why did the Irishman only put 239 beans in his soup?

Because one more would have been too farty.

What's this fly doing in my soup?

The waiter responds, "The backstroke."