What's the most important meal of the day to help you lose pounds?

Brexit

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Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

What is the difference between J. Winston and a cat?

One ruins girls clothes and steals crab legs, the other one is also losing the Rose Bowl.

Why are shopaholics in the UK generally very skinny?

Because they are always losing pounds.

Day Jokes More Day Jokes

How many Californians does it take to change a lightbulb?

Hella. How long does it take them Days.

Why are there no black cults?

Everyone drinks the kool-ade on the first day.

Help Jokes More Help Jokes

How many idiots does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Trick question. Idiots can't screw in lightbulbs regardless of help from other idiots.

How do you know it was an Irishman?

because I had to help him....."

Pound Jokes More Pound Jokes

What do you get if you cross a bee with a quarter of a pound of ground beef?

A humburger.

Why are there so many dogs at the pound?

Because no one wants them.

Brexit Jokes More Brexit Jokes

What's the difference between a feminist and Brexit?

Brexit has actually affected society.

What do you call taking a dump after breakfast?

A Brexit