Who are all these people Twitter wants me to follow?

Has the fail whale been stalking me. Help, stranger danger!

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why was the man intently watching the bowl of snickers?

He wanted to see who would have the last laugh. back to work...

Why did the chicken cross the road half way ?

He wanted to lay it on the line !

People Jokes More People Jokes

Why couldn't people find Joseph?

He was Haydn!

Why do people ask "what the hell were you thinking"?

Obviously, I was thinking I was gonna get away with it and not have to explain it

Twitter Jokes More Twitter Jokes

Why are Twitter jokes not as funny when you read them aloud to a friend?

It's not like they had to be there...

Why did I join Twitter?

Well I was sick of only being hated by coworkers and family so I wanted to branch out.

Follow Jokes More Follow Jokes

What followed the dinosaur ?

It's tail !

What was the German Shepard's defense at his Nuremberg trial?

I was just following odors."

Help Jokes More Help Jokes

What'd you do?

PERSON: Ran a half-marathon and helped my pal move. You ME: I talked to like 4 people.

Which wizard can help you tone up your arms and upper body?

Dumbbelldor.

Stalk Jokes More Stalk Jokes

What do you do in your free time?

I stalk. " "Really I go swimming and for long hikes" "I know.".

What is the definition of stalking?

When two people takes a long, romantic walk on the beach, but only one of them knows about it