What's your emergency?

Boy: Hello? I need your help! 911: Alright, What is it? Boy: Two girls are fighting over me! 911: So what's your emergency? Boy: The ugly one is winning.

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911 Jokes More 911 Jokes

What's your emergency, sir?

Me: I'm being taken away by ducks! I'm being- 911: Please don't do this, sir M: AbDUCKted! 911: *hangs up*

What's your emer- She said don't get her anything for Valentine's Day! 911: And you didn't?

No! 911: Placing you in protective custody.

Girl Jokes More Girl Jokes

Why did the girl cry on the swing?

She has cancer

What's that girl?

Timmy's in the old well L: Arf arf He's dead You sure L: Arf! Okay here's a check for $5K L: ima need cash

Win Jokes More Win Jokes

Why did the barber win the race?

He took a short cut.

What's the difference between a person that just won the lottery and a fairy in salt water?

One is tickled pink, the other is a pickled Tink.

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

What does the unemployed starving man ask his rich baker friend?

I just need some bread

What Does A Chinese Man Need When Taking his Dog Out?

Oven mitts.

Fight Jokes More Fight Jokes

Who wins in a fight: Goku or Superman?

Wrong, Batman always wins.   Yes, I do have the sense of humor of a 5 year old.

Why were the pirates on the ship fighting?

They needed better anchor management.

Emergency Jokes More Emergency Jokes

What's ur emergency?

Goldfish: I forgot Goldfish 911: Forgot what Goldfish: WHO IS THIS Goldfish 911: I DON'T KNOW

What does an helicopter and pants have in common?

They both moust go down in emergency.

Help Jokes More Help Jokes

Why do white girls help fight heartburn?

Because they're so basic.

Why shouldn't anybody help cats down a tree?

Because they're stuck up