Skip Jokes

What do you call it when Batman skips church..?

Christian Bale.

4.7

Paperback

Available on

How do you tell a bad joke from a good joke?

You skip the punchline.

What did the dance instructor say to her student when the student wanted to use her bathroom?

Skip to my loo.

Why did the celiac patient have to skip leg-day?

Because he's allergic to glutes

What do you call a movie about a low-magnitude Iron ion that skips school?

Ferrous Bueller's Day Off

What do you call a man with no arms or legs being pulled behind a boat?

Skip

Why did they skip 9?

Because, 7 8 9...

Why did Microsoft go straight to Windows 10 and skip 9?

Because Windows 8 9.

Why did we skip windows 9?

Because 7 8 9 I'm so sorry

Why did they skip Windows 9?

Because 7 8 9!

Why isn't there a Windows 9?

Hey Microsoft, why is there no Windows 9? You've given us 7 and 8, and now you're skipping straight to 10?" "Well, to be completely honest, 7 8 9."

No Pun Intended (The Last of Us Joke Books)

4.9

Paperback

Available on

Why did Microsoft skip windows 9?

Because 7 ate 9

Why does BuzzFeed skip every other number when counting?

They literally can't even.

Why did Microsoft skip from Windows 8 to Windows 10?

They revived to much XP

What do women and stones have in common?

You skip the flat ones.

Why did Microsoft skip to windows 10?

Because 7 8 9.

Why is Microsoft skipping Windows 9?

Because Windows 7 8 9

Why do we have Martin Luther King Jr. Day off?

So the black people will not be the only ones skipping school.

What do women and rocks have in common?

You can skip the flat ones.

Why are girls like rocks?

You skip the flat ones.

What did the man do after listening to a Pink Floyd album for two hours?

Skip to the next track

4.7

Ceramic

Available on

Where does a thumb meet its type?

At oh-my-goodness! Skip

Why did Microsoft skip from Windows 8 to 10?

Because Windows 7 ate 9!!! :D

Why does granny have black eyes?

She was skipping without her bra

Why did Microsoft skip straight to 10?

Because Windows 7, 8, 9. I'll see myself out.

What the hell?

Why are you skipping numbers girl 1: Because I can't even!!!

Why did Jesus get a ticket?

He tried to skip the Cross walk.

Why did Microsoft skip Windows 9 and go straight to 10?

Because seven "ate" nine.

Why did the paper follow the pencil?

Because it LED THE WAY! I'm on a roll here! this is fun! Skip

Why did Windows skip to 10?

Because 7 ate 9.

What did the pink panther say as he skipped down the sidewalk?

Dead ant, dead ant, dead ant dead ant dead ant dead annnnnt, deaaad ant.

Exceptionally Bad Dad Jokes: So frightfully awful.. yet wonderfully spiffing

4.7

Paperback

Available on

What do you call someone with no arms and no legs being towed behind your boat?

Skip.

What do you call an ant who skips school ?

A truant !

Why did Microsoft skip a number when naming their new operating system?

Because 7 ate 9.

What did the knob say to the door?

I LOCK you a lot! yep, its corny, indeed, but... I'm tryin'! Skip

What's the similarity between a flat chested woman and a stone?

You skip them both.

How are women and rocks alike?

A: You skip across the flat ones.

How does Rudy Giuliani count to 10?

He doesn't he skips 1-8 and says 9-11 ten times.

Why did the knife quit?

It couldn't CUT IT! woohoo! I made this one up while sitting at a buffet table. Enjoy! Skip

Why did Windows skip 9?

Because 7 ate 9.

What did the picture say to the Judge?

I WAS FRAMED! I just now made that up. I feel good about this one! Skip

What kind of disease did the guy get when he skipped the condom and plowed a girl with down's syndrome?

Slow clap

How do you stop a charging bull?

Take away its credit card!*** wa-waa-waaaa! Skip

Why is Microsoft skipping Windows 9 and going straight to Windows 10?

Because 7 8 9!

What's the smartest dinosaur?

Thesaurus Rex! omg, I crack myself up! Skip

What did the chef say when he was skipped in rotation?

Hey that's my toque!!

How are women like rocks?

You skip the flat ones.

What did the wall ask the picture?

All together now!) ***"How's it hangin' "*** Skip

Which side of a horse has the most hair?

The OUTSIDE! oh-my-goodness, that's hilarious! Skip

Why did Microsoft skip windows 9 and annouce windows 10?

Because windows 7 8 9

You might also enjoy:

Eat Jokes More Eat Jokes

What happened when a cannibal went on a self-catering holiday?

He ate himself.

How was your day?

Lifeguard 2: Sad, I saw a bear in lake 1: How is that sad 2: He could bearly swim! 1:.. 2: He ate 3 campers

Good Joke Jokes More Good Joke Jokes

How do you ruin a good joke?

By posting it over and over on the same subreddit

Why are there so many good jokes about feminists?

Well, they're huge targets...

Christian Jokes More Christian Jokes

What do you call an all guy Christian party?

A suseJ fest

What do you get when a Catholic priest baptizes hay?

You get a Christian Bale

Seven Jokes More Seven Jokes

How many Polish people does it take to be pallbearers at a funeral?

Seven. Six to carry the casket and one to drag the body

How many letters are there in the Pirate Alphabet?

Ten. Aye, aye, arr, and the seven seas.

Batman Jokes More Batman Jokes

What is the difference between batman and a black guy?

Batman can walk into a store without Robin

What did Batman say at the deli?

Got ham

Stone Jokes More Stone Jokes

What word allows you to take away two letters and get one?

Stone.

What's the difference between a drunk driver, and a stoned driver?

The drunk driver will drive right through a stop sign. The stoned driver will stop and wait for it to turn green.

Pull Jokes More Pull Jokes

What do hospitals and refrigerators have in common?

If you pull the plug, the vegetables start to decompose.

What's the worst way to convince an officer who's pulled you over not to ticket you?

You can have my beer if you let me go."

Arm Jokes More Arm Jokes

What's the easiest way to twist someone's arm?

Thalidomide

Where do you find a dog with no arms or legs?

Right where ya left him.